So hello again! I know, I know...I am horrible about updating this blog. My mid-new years resolution, to keep this site updated a little more frequently. So here's a little about what's been going on. I will try to make this as short as possible, but than again...it has been awhile.
Brooklynn has been doing so fantastic! - for the most part. Yes, she is still predominantly tube fed, but her feeding has improved so much! She was approved during her last swallow study the beginning of January for trial portions (about an ounce in the morning and an ounce at night) of stage 2 baby food. She has been doing so well, we have slowly "up'ed" the amount of baby food she is getting - with the knowledge that if we hear any congestion, pnemonia, etc...we stop spoon feeding until she is completely cleared up and then we can begin again slowly. She has gotten a slight cold once or twice in which we discontinued her spoon feedings for 2 or 3 days, but she has never (knock on wood) had pnemonia, etc. She is currently eating 3.5 ounces in the morning, 3.5-5 ounces in the evenings, and occasionally 3.5 ounces during lunchtime. She is doing so great! Her lip closure is good, her swallowing is slow but good, and she is beginning to learn the munching pattern and how to rotary chew. We attempted stage 3 baby foods, but got the typical gagging reflex (that even many typical babies give during stage 3...well...it's gross!) Tomorrow we are going to attempt mashed peas and carrots (real people food!) and creamy mashed potatoes to see how she does. I am so excited! We will be doing this during feeding therapy. We have been slowly introducing dissolveable gerber puffs and yogurt melts. It started rough, but she improves more and more each time! All in all, her feeding is going so well. I definitely see a future with no feeding tube. (Although, I don't think it would be such a horrible thing to keep it in solely for medication purposes for those times when she gets sick. Or for when she's sick and just doesn't feel up to eating, it's great to run pedialyte through to keep her hydrated!) Anyways, feeding = great!
So she's still not what you would consider "mobile" yet. Do I think she's mobile? Oh yeah. She is so much busier than I ever remember Devon being! She always, always, always has to be doing something. She just doesn't sit still. But I will tell you, for this, I am extremely grateful! I love that she wants to see everything, and touch everything, and throw things and make a mess! This is how she learns. These are all "typical" baby movements that most parents try to discourage. You never realize that this is all a part of their learning process and development until you have a child where the learning process is just a little more in depth than that of a "typical" child. So do I encourage banging a spoon on pots and pans? Do I encourage opening and closing (slamming!) the doors on the entertainment system? Do I encourage throwing things in certain directions and making messes? Do I encourage putting everything (that is safe) in her mouth? YES...to all of this! I DO! Exploring is all a part of her learning process. Opening, closing, catching, throwing, banging, textures, etc. This is how she learns. And it's amazing how much I've learned. I remember constantly pulling objects out of Devon's mouth when he was little and trying to discourage him to open and slam doors and banging on things and putting things in his mouth. If only I knew then what I know now. So anyways, Brooklynn continues to go to Physical Therapy at the hospital 2 days a week. Although she can sit up unassisted, she cannot get into the sit up position on her own from lying down. She is learning to sit up on her own, she is learning to reach across her body without losing her balance, she is learning to get into the crawling position, and lastly, she is learning to walk! Her upper body strength is incredible. Although weak through her lower body, her lower body strength has improved so much since she has began (at 3 months old.) Physical therapy is moving slow, but the amount of frustration she shows and not being able to get to where she wants, I know it will all come soon. They are using the treadmill to teach her to walk. She is put into a harness and on a slow speed to force her to put one foot in front of the other. She learns very quickly! She does well at holding herself in the crawling position, and she has stood on her own (did not pull herself up - but was put in that position) holding on to a table with both KAFO's on for about 12 seconds. It was so awesome! At every small acheievement, we clap and cheer her on. I hope one day to see her clap for herself as well as some babies do. We're working on it!
We're also working on blowing kisses! She loves it and laughs when someone blows her a kiss, and we attempt to help her blow kisses, but she hasn't quite gotten the hang of it herself yet. It too, will come. In time. What she DOES do...is actually give kisses! This is new! And I am beyonddddddd thrilled! One of my favorite things. All I have to do is simply ask "Brooklynn, can mommy have a kiss?" And I get one! A big, slobbery, open mouthed kiss. Of course, I ask over and over. And she loves to give them! She is so sweet.
So, Brooklynn in a nutshell....she loves to give kisses, loves Barney but even more so - she has a new profound love for Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and shows enourmous excitement at the site of Mickey on TV, we can't pick a favorite food as she seems to love them all so much and get's so excited to be spoon fed. She currently says "mama" and "uh-uh" - (as in "no") when we ask her a question. She can roll a ball back and forth, but when holding an object - she tends to toss everything behind her. She absolutely LOVES to go swimming in the swimming pool and gets excited at the sight of me pulling her bathing suit out. She also LOVES to go on golf cart rides and walks in her stroller - especially bumpy rides. She laughs anytime we hit a big bump in her stroller. She still loves to pull hair and thinks its funny to bite. (I am currently trying to break her of those two habits.) She loves it when I sing to her. She loves when I sing her Barney "I Love You" or "Mr. Knickerbocker," and she loves songs about rainbows - "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" and her very favorite, "Rainbow Connection." She sleeps great at night and I think I've finally figured out the right amount of Miralax to get her to produce regular bowel movements. YAYYYYY! In the last few weeks, I have only had to administer 2 enemas. I LOVE not having to give her an enema. It is about an hour and a half process getting it all made and ready, administering it, and waiting. So glad to be most of the way through with that!
So I guess this wasn't so short after all. I just have a quick story to share if you can bear it....
So I knew this would be inevitable, and in time, I would run into this. I actually figured it would have happened sooner than it did, but we have been so lucky and blessed, that it actually took almost 17 months to happen. Devon, Brooklynn and I were out shopping at The Avenue here in Peachtree City this past Saturday. I had Brooklynn in her stroller as I usually do. During the colder months, she was usually covered with a blanket, so her differences were not as noticeable. It's summertime, and too hot for a blanket. So of course, like a normal baby, she was simply just strapped into her stroller, paci and puppy in hand. And we were shopping like anyone else would. Of course it was Saturday, so all the stores were pretty busy. We were strolling through American Eagle and had made our way to the back of the store where there is a sitting area with a couple chairs and a table. There was a woman sitting in one chair with a clear visible view of Brooklynn. Her husband was sitting in the other chair - he didn't have the same view as we were kind of positioned behind one of the clothes racks. The woman was looking at Brooklynn (nothing new, everyone does.) Let me start with, I am very used to the stares and questions as it's not every day that people see a 17 month old baby with a full heavy pink brace on her leg and a feeding tube attached to her leading to a bag attached to the stroller. I completely understand that for some, it is an uncomfortable situation and they are at a loss for words. But until that day, it seems that everyone I've encountered have either looked for a quick second and quietly looked away, or they will simply ask questions. Like "What happened to her leg?" or "What is that tube for?" or even "Is she okay?" I am more than happy to tell you why she has a brace and a feeding tube and explain RTS to people. Awareness, right? I have literally spent long periods of time, even more than an hour, talking with perfectly good strangers about Brooklynn's situation. Most people have handled the situation with grace and understanding. After being educated, they usually follow their questions and end our visit with a pleasant comment for example, "but she's so cute!" or "you would never know anything is wrong without her brace and tube attached to her." Or even just a "wow, she's been through a lot!" I've usually had a fairly good experience with strangers and educating them about RTS. Well, not Saturday. The woman in the chair was staring, leaned over to her husband loudly whispering, he goes out of his way to lean far away from his chair and around the clothes rack to stare at Brooklynn himself. After a "LONG" stare, he follows it with looking me straight in the eye with looks of complete and utter "disgust." For the first time, I felt the sting of it. I knew he was thinking "she did that to that baby." I so wanted to say "no, I did not swing her by her legs and break one," "I did not push her down," "no, I do not, and did not take drugs or alcohol while I was pregnant with her." A million things were running through my mind at once during these few short moments of hurt. But let me be clear...it was a VERY few short moments of hurt. All about 10-20 seconds was I hurt by this man and his wife and their loud whispering and glares of disgust. After those few seconds, my hurt and anger turned to sorry. I felt very sorry for this man and his wife who were also shopping with their 2 young (elementary/middle school aged children.) I felt sorry for their ignorance. Sorry for their lack of understanding and compassion. Sorry that because of them, there is a good chance that their children will turn out just like them - as they were there by their side. Sorry that my son Devon had to witness this hideous act of human incompetancy toward his sister whom he adores and will stand up for. And sorry that I know we will come face to face with this man again because we recognized him as a father who's son plays basketball in the same league as Devon. Sorry that he is who he is. Most of all, I am sorry that he will never have the opportunity to know and love someone in his life as beautiful and wonderful as Brooklynn. I know I will come across this from time to time, and it's not okay. But I will do my best to ignore and move on. And like any parent would do, I will do my best to make these awful encounters into a good learning experience for myself, Devon, and the rest of my friends and family.
Sweet Dreams.
